Tuesday, May 19, 2009

What is the best recipe??

When the children come into the age where they are continuously trying to test their limits, the parents will have a hard time. The behavior of the child varies, from screaming to kicking to hitting. Suddenly the toothless baby who was used to send smiles all over the place and captured the hearts of those around is showing his teeth and hides his smile behind bad actions.
Then the question come up: now what?? How to respond?? how to control and show him what is wrong and right? What are the best tips??
Especially with the first child, the parents are learning as well how to be parents, knowing that every decision they make will effect their child's life forever (sounds serious!!!), actually it is.
I have been looking around in books and online, talking to people i know to find the best advice, and i have heard many things some where logical, some where scary and unbelievable.
Scaring with the (doggy who will come and eat you) or scaring with (hot pepper on the tongue) or scaring with ( something hot like a candle) are somethings that i was surprised that people are using. Hitting is common although some families completely refuse this methods while others say: we cannot control our kids without it.
Another new way, many learned it from "Super Nanny" is putting them on time out for some minutes. This sounds as the best method for me if the child is actually following and staying in the time out, but if not it is useless. Another method is taking his favourite toy away to show him that what he has done is wrong.
Now after all of these tips i am trying my luck with time outs and taking the toys away. Currently i am trying to ignore the actions that are intended to get my attention to let him know that he is not getting it in this way, i will see. In one of the online forums i found the following advice: Be positive, never negative. Be nice but strict. Try to give him attention and spend quality time with your child. It will take some time but you will reach there.
I am trying to see which is the best for my child and i hope he will be easier to deal with.